OK, I have a confession to make...
I was convinced (No seriously, convinced!) that Ryan and I were going to win the CHEO dream home, and by convinced I mean,
scarily unrealistically attached to the idea.
I must have done the virtual walk through like a thousand times, had planned out where everything would go once we had moved in and had visions of what our life was GOING to be like when we were confirmed Dream Home winners. I get that this is part of the fun of buying a ticket, but I was crossing the line here. And, whomp whomp, *spoiler alert, we didn't win.
I was crushed. I had made all the plans. Our life was going to be so much easier, funner, fancier when we lived in the Dream Home. I realize that this is cray, but you guys....I wanted it so bad (insert foot stomp here).
Ryan kept reminding me that we bought tickets this year, yes to dream of the big win, but also to support the hospital where Vaughn had his tonsils and adenoids removed this past summer. Due to him refusing his pain medication we also spent a sleepover in the emergency room and I tells ya, I was beyond grateful that we were only there for a tonsillectomy/pain management and not for something more serious, as I saw some things that were truly heartbreaking. And how lucky are we, to have a children's hospital so close by, if we ever really do need it!
*Note: When we did the initial walk through of the house I might have been quoted as saying "you couldn't pay me to live here" so I mean, well played universe, well played.
Lately, life has been kicking me in the nads and winning the Dream Home felt like it would be such an easy fix (and a complete upgrade!). It would be stress free. We would have space to spread out, entertain, and organize ourselves so we were not always tripping over our stuff, or each other. All of the spaces would be finished, which would relieve the stress of so many unfinished projects. Our time and money would be freed up to spend with our friends/family.
We would have also won a second vehicle which would allow Ry to get around while I'm at work, so he would not feel so cooped up. The free year of Molly Maid service was also going to be key, 'cause free maid service = life(I'm assuming). And while all this was happening I was going to be able to FINALLY just relax, live my life and enjoy my family.
Alas, it was not meant to be. After gaining some perspective slash having no choice but to carry on and face the brutal reality of life, I have come to the conclusion that 1. Our situation is not awful and could definitely be worse, and b. I'm in control of what is happening in my life and banking on winning my way to a "better" life is so dang stupid. I'm determined to make some changes to make my home, and life, a tad bit dreamier.
PROJECT GET IT TOGETHER
part 1: THE HOUSE
1.FINISH THE BASEMENT! If we could just get the basement together, we could have a dedicated space for the kiddos to play which would free up SO MUCH SPACE on the main level.
This is where we are starting. #hoarderscalledtheywanttheirhouseback
This is really the catalyst for all the other rooms so I just NEED to focus on getting it done!
2. Once the basement is complete, and most of the toys are down there. I can then concentrate on finishing up the other spaces. I also need to be disciplined enough to finish something and then leave it alone already.
The kids have already been in all three bedrooms...it's crazy!
There is nothing I can do to make this house bigger. But, we love living in this community, we love our proximity to amenities, we love the kids' school, and none of that would have been able to come with us to the so-called Dream Home.
The reality is, we probably never would have been able to afford to maintain a big house like that and would have needed to sell it anyway (I mean which wouldn't have sucked either-it's currently on the market for $1.4M by the actual winner.)
Our lives are really up in the air right now with Ryan out of work, but we have decided to take control and make some changes that will allow us to make "the dream" closer to reality.
I get the feeling that no matter where you are on the food chain of success none of us feel like we are where we should be, and that's dumb. Who says we have to be anywhere... I think that's the biggest lesson I learned out of all this Dream Home reflection. I don't need a big house, or a fancy car to be happy. I just need to be happy, and fortunately I'm in control of my own happiness, and I'm going to try my darn-est to remember that. So, wherever you are in life I hope you will join me in trying to make it a bit easier, funner, fancier...happier. Because, dudes, this is it.